I became a father for the first time at 43. My wife and I had talked about it for years, circled around it, convinced ourselves we were too busy, too settled, too set in our ways. Then life made the decision for us, and here we are.
I'm a freelance software engineer working from a home office in the suburbs, which means I have a front-row seat to the chaos. Two kids, a dog that thinks she's also a child, and a coffee machine that's doing the real parenting.
I started DadFAQ because when I was trying to figure this all out, I couldn't find honest writing from other older dads. There are thousands of parenting blogs, but most are written by people in their late twenties who can still function on four hours of sleep. I wanted the version where someone admits that their back hurts, that they worry about being at their kids' graduation in a wheelchair, and that they've Googled "is it normal to cry at a Peppa Pig episode" at 1am.
What I write about
Mostly the stuff nobody warned me about. The physical exhaustion that hits differently at 43. The anxiety about mortality that nobody mentions in the parenting books. Finding community when every other dad at the school gate is a decade younger. The financial calculations that keep you up at night. And the unexpected joy of it all, which is real, and which coexists with everything else.
A note on the advice here
I'm not a doctor, a therapist, or a financial advisor. I'm a dad with a blog and a lot of opinions. Take what's useful, leave what isn't.
Questions? Topics you want me to tackle? I read everything. The best way to reach me is via the newsletter.